


Who Cares About the Friends He Made Along The Way?

by Mightybignein (Blueberryshortcake)



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, Lucien also thinks they're called the Mighty Nine but has his own name for the group, Lucien needs someone to gossip with, Lucien thinks they're all sexy but there is a lil bit of nonagast, Lucien tries to figure out who's sleeping with who, Lucien's view of the M9, Set after 121 with minor spoilers for 122, and also how he would beat them in mortal combat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 21:27:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28981083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blueberryshortcake/pseuds/Mightybignein
Summary: Lucien watches the dome and muses about the people he's never in his life ever met before.
Relationships: The Mighty Nein & The Mighty Nein
Comments: 1
Kudos: 87





	Who Cares About the Friends He Made Along The Way?

He was completely unfamiliar with these people. 

They were colourful and loud and annoying and sometimes incomprehensible. Talking in half stories. Communicating through inside jokes. Sometimes treating him as if he should be in on it, sometimes resenting that he wasn’t. 

Fuckers.

That word seemed the right label to give the ‘Mighty Nine’ although there weren't nine of them despite the wizard always emphasising all ‘nine’ of us. Another little joke. 

They were fun though too. He was a goal oriented person on a schedule. If this had been another where and when perhaps meeting these fuckers would have been a delight. He liked the company of the unbridled. These ones. They’re frustratingly the type he usually likes and gets along with. 

It annoys him. 

It makes him think of the little speck they’re all enamoured with. He doesn’t like thinking of that other person who never even mattered, who was never him. Just a piece of him. The corner of his smile, the tip of his arrogance. 

Well it wasn’t all of them, was it? Clay with his sharp ears and know-it-all wisdom held no relations with the other. But his ‘perspective’ wasn’t as helpful to the rest of the fuckers as he might think. 

Nor was the implication that Lucien needed saving! Appreciated, thank you  _ very _ much. 

He wasn’t a prisoner. He wasn’t crazy. He had plans. Things that he had put his life towards. 

They treated him like they owed him a rescuing. Rescuing from what? His own goddamn purpose? How arrogant. 

Fuckers.

But he’s been nice, and patient. Taken into account their relationship with his body if not himself. And they’re powerful and strong and if he can keep them reigned it would be useful. Besides. He doesn’t want to fight them. They’re strong. Even if he can cancel their spells they’re slippery enough they might find ways around it.

First it would have to be the Clerics. Tall boy first and it was absolutely not to make a point to him. Then Jester. She had a danger about her. Both of them were worshipers and Lucien wasn’t one to underestimate gods. He’d learn from his elder’s mistakes. 

Brooding Caleb would be useless as long as he kept at least one eye on him. Good that one was easy on the eyes. Although all of them weren’t half bad to look at. 

Their sneaky halfling was one for dirty tricks, but you can’t be hidden if you’re always seen. She’s only a danger in shadows.

That left Fjord, Beauregard and Yasha. 

Beefy bunch. Quiet and sad Yasha might hesitate and that could be taken advantage of. Fjord had been itching to fight as soon as they began their traveling together, and Beauregard didn’t seem the type to pull punches. 

So take out the dick monk first, then the foolhardy fjord, then Yasha if she even brings herself to fight. 

Hm, though Yasha might be the angry type. Maybe her and Beauregard together. Judging by the sexual tension they might like that. 

With no clerics behind them it would be hard, but his crew would be able to wear them down, knock out, knock out, knock out, then clean up the rogue and wizard. Wizard might be handy.

He hummed to himself considering Mr. Caleb’s offer. Letting him read the book would certainly be funny if nothing else. It was also a gamble. Greedy for knowledge that one. More tempered than Lady Vess though Lucien’d wager. He would be more in control this time, and he knows far more than he did back then. Giving Caleb a taste might be worth the benefits. 

He watched as the halfling and human hugged each other, their silhouettes just visible under their little turtle shell. 

Hmm…. no there was mention of a husband somewhere in the scrying he was pretty sure, so not fucking… not that that nessisarily meant anything.

He took a moment to figure out who was lusting after who in the Mighty Nine. Lemesee. Jester and Fjord for sure. Fjord is always trying to cut off his line of sight when he looks in Jester’s direction. It was cute. Seems new and uncertain. They both gave each other  _ looks  _ though. 

Next most obvious would be Yasha and Beau. A monk so annoying he wasn’t sure how she could ever manage to get a date. That angel blood really deserves better. 

And it’s not because of any lingering feelings deep down inside. He had never met that Yasha before.

It was only that Beauregard was so talented at pissing him off.

So then after is Veth and Caleb who read as ‘it’s complicated.’ He quietly bet to himself the human sees it as platonic and the halfling would hit it if she wasn’t already in a relationship. 

Buuut. She’s out here in the ice and snow with the wizard no husband to be seen. Interesting interesting. 

He had seen a few glances from the wizard towards little blue though. 

Heh, maybe they’re all fucking each other. He could get behind that. 

Although, Mr. Perspective. Too lofty for screwing the co-workers he’d reckon. Or maybe he’s just not into it. Fair enough.

Too bad the fuckers were so uneasy with him, a bit of gossip would be fun. 

The Nine switched the watch and Lucien laughed at himself. Going from how he’d defeat them to who’s fucking who. He must have too much time on his hands.

He leaned back and continued staring at them knowing it would creep them out. 

He mused to their conversation by the campfire. He still doesn’t know what to make of them. Even listening into their whispered conversations they don’t make a lot of sense. Sea monsters and unicorns indeed. 

He’d never recruit them. How could he? They weren’t believers. They weren’t the worshipful. They could barely follow without running out ahead to their own path. Those fuckers. Even their clerics have an odd bend to them in their religion. 

They reminded him of himself, especially when he had been young. Hah! They made fun of him, but they didn’t notice they were in their own little insular cult. Codependency written all over their faces. In fact, they were worse off! He could live without Kree and the rest. Sad to see them go, but he wouldn’t shed a tear. He was all that was needed in the end. Those ones? Take away any of them and they’d obsess and crumble unable to move until they’re all safe.

Little Blue seemed to glue them together with cheerfulness and kindness. Mr. Perspective was probably the voice of reason and honesty. The protective half-orc was the cat wrangler; he had his own brand of chaos, and a lack of patience, but he would pull them towards decisions. The rogue cut through their bullshit, she was good at breaking down what needed to be broken down and to get to the heart of matters, Then there’s the dick and broody one two different sides of the same coin of logic. Sharp justice and glutinous curiosity, self righteousness and hubris. They kept each other in balance, and Angel Blood... she protected them. She seemed loyal sort.

And they all, disgustingly, loved each other. Each one of them their own weakness. All Lucien had to do was pick at one of the threads. 

But the threads seemed very capable of guarding one another. 

His eyes looked towards the lump that was the sleeping wizard. Curiosity was the best fishing line. He would be the easiest. It just meant Lucien would need to have confidence in keeping him in line and not let him get ideas about becoming a one man show like Lady Vess. 

And fuck it, it was fucking freezing out here. ‘Books and Cats’ sounded just fine to him. Better than freezing ass end of nowhere. 

His mind pulled to the end of that little exchange. She had to have done it on purpose. Card readers are liars. She had to have slipped the cards the way she wanted. He had been watching for it, but her being quick with her hands wouldn’t be unexpected. Those draws were far too pointed. As pointed as Caleb’s demands, and Beauregard’s attitude, and Yasha’s grief. 

Death. 

Fuckers would love that wouldn’t they? But if he died again it wouldn’t be their fragment coming back. He was gone. He understood why that little piece of consciousness might have been fond, but that wasn’t his fondness. 

So then, the attractive wizard. Set the bait, hook line and sinker. And it’ll be his own fault for it too. No need for Lucien to feel guilty about it. 

He did not care about the friends an infinitesimally small piece of himself made along the way. 


End file.
